Understanding Engineers 1

 

Two engineering students were riding bicycles across a university campus when one said to the other, "Where did you get the great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes, and said, "Take what you want."

 

The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice: The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway."

 

Understanding Engineers 2

 

To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

 

Understanding Engineers 3

 

A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers.

 

The engineer fumed, "What's with those guys? We've been waiting for fifteen minutes!"

The doctor chimed in, "I don't think I've ever seen such inept golf!"
The priest said, "Here comes the greens-keeper. Let's have a word with him." He said, "Hello George, What's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" 

The greens-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime!"

The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I'll say a special prayer for them tonight."

The doctor said, "Good idea. I'll contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything she can do for them."

The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"

Understanding Engineers 4

What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.

Understanding Engineers 5

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"

The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"

The graduate with a Commerce degree asks, "How much will it cost?"

The graduate with an Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?

 

Understanding Engineers 6

Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it isn't sufficiently complex yet.

And Finally

Two engineers were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking at its top. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of this flagpole," said Steve, "but we don't have a ladder."

The woman took pliers from her purse, loosened a couple of bolts, and laid the pole down on the ground. Then she took a tape measure from her purse, took a measurement, announced, “21 feet," and walked away.

One engineer shook his head and laughed, "A lot of good that does us. We ask for the height and she gives us the length!"

Both engineers have since quit their engineering jobs and have been elected  to Congress.

 This weekend!!

 

 

Bronze Wadsworth plans to advocate for new facility

 

IMLAY CITY — Earlier this month, Imlay City residents officially welcomed the city’s new postmaster, Bronze Wadsworth.

He’s held the title since March but his staff hosted a community open house to officially welcome him on Friday, April 8. Refreshments were served and the post office on Third Street was decorated with posters made by his four kids.

Posters made by his wife and kids decorated the post office during the open house.

“I’m enjoying it quite a bit,” he said of his new job title.

A recent transplant from Arizona, Wadsworth has worked for the postal service for 10 years. Before coming to Imlay City, he spent time at post offices in Sterling Heights, Port Huron and Mt. Morris. He’s worked as an instructor and assistant supervisor as well.

As postmaster in Imlay City, he oversees 13 employees.

He describes himself as being “slightly bilingual,” something that’s proven to be helpful when native Spanish- speaking customers require assistance at the post office’s service counter.

“I’m just here to help,” Wadsworth said.

Although he and his family reside in Yale, Wadsworth said they frequent many businesses in the Imlay City area and feel it’s important to be a part of the community.

In addition to his full-time job, Wadsworth serves as a volunteer firefighter and first responder in St. Clair County.

In addition to managing daily operations in Imlay City, Wadsworth said he has one larger goal too—to advocate for a new post office building for Imlay City.

The plaque on the wall behind him indicates the current facility was constructed in 1956 during the Dwight Eisenhower administration.

“It’s time for an upgrade,” he said, adding that a larger space will eventually be needed as the community grows.